


Forgotten Hero

by testedcyberneticz



Category: SteamWorld Quest (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Fluff, Gilgamech is rude but.. You know, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Idk what else to put here???, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Child Abuse, Post-Game(s), Serious Injuries, at least for now lol, chronic injuries, i guess, mass murder mention
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-20
Updated: 2020-04-11
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:01:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22821433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/testedcyberneticz/pseuds/testedcyberneticz
Summary: A fic about how Gilgamech ended up where he is in the end credits, and a little bit after that.
Comments: 23
Kudos: 3





	1. You're An Idiot

**Author's Note:**

> HI I'M VERY INVESTED IN GILGAMECH'S CHARACTER POTENTIAL SO. HAVE THIS. it's. Gonna be long and a bit head canon heavy

For the first time in a long while, the world was quiet. For the first time in a long while, he hated it. For the first time in a long while, he didn't want attention from anyone. It was a foreign feeling, honestly. Then again, what was he to even do after this? 

Gilgamech simply felt empty. It clicked together in his mind that he had never come up with a backup plan, anything for support in the case he failed. He had only seen the best outcome, not even slightly not as good, or the current outcome. The current outcome, of course, being the worst outcome. No success. Nothing. The only thing to show for his efforts was shaky movements from his current wounds and a sense of shame. A _deep_ sense of shame, at that. Then again, the only way it could be worse was him being dead, or... 

"Hmph. You waited so long to heal yourself out of embarrassment. What if I hadn't come here to see if there was anything I could find, what would you be doing? Rusting away laying face first on the ground?" Of course, the Merchant of all people thought it appropriate to randomly break into the fortress. Of course she decided to fix him up, and of course she had to lecture him. 

"Perhaps." 

"Don't speak like that." It was clear she was angry. He didn't blame her, "You've gone and messed up a lot, you better not start on yourself either!" 

"I fear I failed that the moment the Behemoth rose and looked my way." He explained with a sigh. It was true, the moment that thing had risen, he realized just how horrible of a plan it was. It was only then when it was actually happening had he realized the exact reason his "old friend" had decided to retire. 

"What did you _expect_?" The Merchant's words were sharp. Gilgamech felt a massive wave of confusion wash over him in that moment. What kind of question was that? To _win_ , obviously! To destroy it and get what he _deserved_ after so _long!_

"To kill it." His words lacked a tone of any kind. 

"Oh by- How did you expect the confrontation to _go?!_ " She huffed in frustration as she focused on fixing him, it proving to be a rather difficult task. 

"I already told you!" What was she even getting at? What other answer even was there? 

"You're an idiot. When you went and summoned that thing, when you went to fight it alone, when you had _already been brought down once_ , what did you expect to even happen?" 

"I expected it to be easy because I'd done it be-!" His words paused and choked as his mind completely processed her words, " _Wait_. How did you know about that." His tone shifted and the sentence sounded less like a question and more like a demand. He knew she didn't see the first round of the fight, so how did she- 

"Orik asked me a favor." 

He felt like his helmet was going to crack into pieces. 

"Of course, of course he did! First he comes here and then-!" He buried his face in his hands, causing him to flinch because everything _hurt_. He really wasn't fond of how worried Orik was, not at all. It was frustrating, and he couldn't place why. 

He was at his tipping point. 

"He had to tell me of your injuries, okay? I wanted to find some things to sell since this place is so abandoned, and it's safer without the Void... Your army going around the place. Orik caught wind and asked. I'm not one to deny an old friend help, now am I?" She paused, "Also... You should _probably_ take the pressure off your hands." 

"What?" Gilgamech's tone was softer than he wanted it to be. 

"Did you not hear the noise you were making?" 

"... No. No I did not." What kind of noise was he making? It had to be enough for her to be concerned, right? He didn't like that he managed to not notice what kind of noises he was making. 

"Try to not move much for now. I don't want what happened earlier." Of course, what happened earlier was him trying to get out of the fortress completely alone and with no help with a body that barely wanted to move and screamed out in pain every second. Even he had to admit it was stupid, and it was even more embarrassing when the merchant could tell what was going on based by sound alone. 

For some time, the only sound in the room, in the entire fortress, was the noises of fixing and occasionally pained sounds. The near complete quiet was almost suffocating as his mind wondered what he was going to do after this, if he could even live after this. Who knew about what happened in completion? Who didn't? If those who did tell, would people be out for blood? 

"What happened to you?" The Merchant's voice was quiet. 

"Hm?" He was shaken out of his thoughts as he looked up at her. 

"You weren't like this before. What happened?" 

"I decided to fight for what's right is what happened." He was starting to doubt his own words almost. Almost. 

"Well you fought for it in the worst way possible, is 'what happened'. Did you even _know_ what you were fighting for? You talk of heroism but..." Her sentence dropped and died. There was no reason to complete it, they both understood completely. And with that, so did Gilgamech's filter. 

" _SHI-!_ " His hand twitched harshly and made a small cracking noise that filled him with dread. He was just barely able to even censor himself as well, it feeling like a new layer of Hell just attacked his hand. This also caused him to have several thoughts all at once that he wanted to push away about the possibilities of what just happened. 

"You're fine, you're fine!" The Merchant's voice was panicked, almost like she knew his thought process just now. He wouldn't doubt if she did. However, how he was "fine" after that would be something he would absolutely need an explanation for. 

"Are you fixing me or _breaking me?!_ " Only after speaking did Gilgamech realize his voice sounded like he barely choked those words out. 

"Believe it or not that was me putting a part inside your hand back together... Didn't think that would happen, though." 

He hissed through his helmet, "I don't understand why you decided to even do this." 

"Oh for- because after what you've done, I still care about you! You were walking like you were about to keel over and _die!_ I remember when I helped you and Orik on your adventure, I remember how you were then, and I know something happened that made you like this, something that I know you haven't told _anyone_ , or else this wouldn't have _happened!_ " The merchant's grip on her tools tightened along with her words, then loosened when she sighed, "After the first fight, you both changed. You really did. But I know something even more happened." 

Gilgamech was taken aback, if he was being honest. Mostly, because she was right. He remembered when Orik had begun wearing his mask more often after the first battle. Something else definitely happened, too, but he wasn't about to say it, not now. He wasn't going to confess that kind of thing when he already felt like he was about to be disintegrated from existence any second now. He felt defeated and angry and _nothing_. 

"Give me back your hand." Said the Merchant after silence that felt like it had lasted forever. He complied, because there wasn't exactly anything else to do. Everything just felt extremely awkward now, until she said, "I'm not going to deny an old friend help, and that includes you, even if you hate it."


	2. Grinder

Most had experience in fixing a steambot. Sometimes it would take long, such as three hours or so. Others, it would take a measly five minutes. Gilgamech, however, was stressed when realizing that by the time he was fixed to a state where he wouldn't fall over if he breathed, the sun had set. Had it truly taken so long? How bad had his injuries been? 

"Don't stand up too quickly." Said the Merchant before he could even try. 

"Why." It was less a question and more a comment. 

"I fixed you up but..." She paused for awhile. A long while. Too long, actually, "I'm not one to lie, some things are permanent." The sentence hit him like a hammer. 

" _What_." 

"Did you think I could fix it all?" 

"Yes! I did! Because that's how it _works!_ When you get fixed that's how it _works!_ " His voice heightened in panic before he could even stop it. He had desperately hoped that it would be possible, it had to be right? For just a second, he swore he heard something when he moved. 

"It's not like Orik's, you can still walk fine, it's alright, okay? You haven't even stood yet. Just try standing up, don't panic." Said the Merchant in the calmest voice possible. Gilgamech, however, was not convinced and felt panic rising in his furnace. He didn't want anything permanent, not a single thing, it would remind him too much of now, of _then_. 

He stayed put. 

"Do you need help up-" 

"No." 

"... Gilgamech. Are you sure." 

"Yes I'm sure." 

Even more time passed. Then, Gilgamech hesitantly put his hand out, and for the first time realized that the sound was the unsettling noise of grinding coming from directly inside him. His own movement was slowed down, too. It wasn't by much, but it was still noticeable. 

Once he was actually being helped up, he noticed the grinding getting louder, and realized just how much harder it was actually getting up, too. Everything suddenly felt much, much worse. He also immediately leaned against the wall as he realized just how bad the grinding was and how his balance felt like a cracked plank of wood. Reality hit as he realized just how _wrong_ everything about himself was right now. 

"Are you-" 

" _I feel sick_." He wasn't even sure if those were the right words. 

"It'll probably feel better after some rest, but-" 

"I'm stuck like this? _This_ is what I have to deal with now?" His panic was back in his words. This all felt so _wrong_. 

"Can you actually listen to me? I did the best I could. I used the best of everything I have. Some parts of it will fade as they need time, but other things just aren't fixable without literally tearing you apart. This is what happens when go and try to start a playground fight with a monster made by the Gods!" Her words were as calm as she could put them together, but even then it sounded tense. 

"Oh Algyron, this is _permanent_..." He needed to get himself together, this wasn't leading anywhere, but the grinding was so _loud_. He tried to compose himself, then said, "Fine. I'll just go on my way." 

"What?" If her eyes weren't covered, he knew he would've seen her eyes darting back and forth. Did she even have eyes? 

"I can walk now, so I can leave." 

"There's monsters on the way back." 

"And? I can fight them." That's what he really wanted to do. Get his mind off of the... everything. Especially the _grinding_. 

"You absolutely can not! Have you not noticed your state of self?!" Her arms motioned to... Well, every part of him. 

"My state of self is I can walk without falling on my face. That's all I need." He was lying and he knew it. It felt like he could fall right now, first of all. Second, he knew he needed more than that. But he wasn't about to go and destroy the last of his pride. The Merchant went quiet at this and her expression became unreadable. 

"You're a fool. You're not going to go and fight anything out there and for awhile." 

"You're not my mother, may I remind you." He was absolutely not having this. Focusing was hard enough right now, he didn't need to have such a stupid argument. 

"You think you can do any magic in the state your in? If you get hurt who'll save you from being crushed to nothing but _charred scrap metal?_ " The Merchant's hands became crossed across her arms. 

"I-" 

"You surviving the Behemoth's attacks on you was pure _luck_ and you know it." Now it was Gilgamech's turn to be quiet for what felt like too long. 

"Damn it." She was right. Because, of course, she was right. There was a reason his body was like this right now, had he been hit differently he probably wouldn't be alive right now. 

"Has anyone ever washed your mouth with soap?" The Merchant hesitantly joked in obvious hopes of lighting up the mood with but a low battery flashlight. 

"It would melt." He stated in complete seriousness, not very much noticing what he was saying at that point. Every movement he made resulted in that grinding noise picking up, he _despised_ it. He was already feeling out of it the moment the _everything_ had happened, the entire time being fixed, and now this. 

"Even then, where are you even planning to go?" Her words striked through him. He wasn't completely thinking of that. He was too focused on everything going on, on the fact he lost, on the fact he didn't have a failure plan. He just wanted out of here, it was just a giant grave now. A giant grave that had been desecrated multiple times over. 

He was still leaning on the wall. He moved his wrist experimentally, almost cringing, then pointed in the opposite direction from himself, "Out." That was really the only response he could give without it becoming a several hour long rant. 

"To...?"

"Just... _Out_." His tone softened to the point he could see the Merchant expressing discomfort in her expression alone. 

"Gilgamech, you sound exhausted." 

"I am." It came out before he could really stop it, and he questioned if he ever planned to hide it.

Then suddenly, "Let's go." 

"What?" 

"Let's go, come on." 

"Merchant-" 

"Come on." 

"What are you-" 

"The wagon. Come on. Let's go."

"Can you explain-" 

"We're going in the wagon." 

"We...?"

"Did I slur my words?" 

"No you did not, but-" 

"You're not rotting here in isolation and you are not going out there alone and ending up as the world's worst toothpick. Come on." 

"You're _serious_?" His voice conveyed the most disbelief he'd expressed in awhile. 

"Yes! I am! I'm an old woman and I'm tired of you acting like such a fool so let's go before I make you." She huffed and gestured to her wagon, which she had somehow gotten into the fortress. Gilgamech sighed and for a second the image of him falling to the floor flashed in front of him. 

"Could you help me get to it, at least?" 


	3. Wagon Ride

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi. Idk how to spell Necronomicog.

The wagon was bigger on the inside. Not to mention just being plain weird, considering he was told that no matter what he shouldn't look outside when moving. For once he really wanted to listen to that warning. 

"I don't like that I can hear you but not see you." Gilgamech stated bluntly. This was a _wagon_. He should be able to see her just fine. 

"It does what it does when it wants." It was unsettling hearing the wagon being talked about like a living being, "Aren't you going to get some rest, by the way?" 

" _Ugh_." He rubbed his hands against his helmet. 

"That answered nothing." The Merchant huffed in an almost joking manner. 

"The grinding is making it hard to do so." He noticed his own voice had a sense of as if his insides were covered in grit. 

"It'll happen eventually." He swore he could feel her shrugging just by her tone. He decided to not return the words. At least, for ten minutes straight, which resulted in quiet for just as long. Something was gnawing at his conscience. 

"... Why are you even still helping me? It doesn't make _sense_ , you did whatever favor Orik asked of you." He was getting frustrated at this point, he didn't get it. There had to be more reason. 

"Why are you asking?" 

"I... What?" 

"Sure, you nearly caused the end of the world. You have no idea how frustrating that is. But why are you asking about why I'm helping you?" Gilgamech could feel how much she was smirking, he swore he could. 

" _Don't_ pull this." 

"Are you feeling guil-?" 

" _Shut up_." Silence filled the wagon again, and after some time he only then noticed that his hand was digging into his scarred side. He wasn't feeling anything. _He wasn't_. Not a single thing. He didn't need that. He didn't need that on his mind, not at all. 

"So... What about the grinding? You mentioned it." The Merchant questioned in a more awkward tone of voice after some time. 

"The grinding. It's loud, wouldn't you be able to hear it?" 

"That must be the faint noise I've been hearing." He felt confusion rise. Faint? It was loud and obnoxious. How could she faintly hear it? She had the best hearing out of everyone he knew. Was something even _more_ wrong with him than he had thought? 

Or maybe he should just stop thinking about it. 

"You're not good at conversation, are you?" 

"Hm?" 

"Exactly my point. This may shock you, but usually in conversation, people listen and respond to each other." 

"... Right." What was wrong with his voice? 

"What I was asking, anyway, was that if you're sure you truly don't know where to go now?" 

"It... _Hmph_." He cut himself off. He didn't have an answer that would cut down his pride into pieces. 

"That's a yes I see. Try to think of some ideas." 

"The Cursed City? No one really cares who you are there." Then again, that might change considering who _he_ is, and if news got out about what happened... And if that was true, then it would probably be the best place to die if he had to. 

... 

That was morbid. 

The Merchant's tone shifted faster than before a bowling ball can hit the floor, " _That's because almost everyone there is dead, Gilgamech_." 

" _What_? What are you talking about?" What kind of response was that?! He remembered hearing how it bustled with action, that visits there guaranteed a pickpocketing! He heard of the lack of housing because there were so many people, he heard of the ability for none of those people to move to somewhere better. 

"Oh no. Oh you don't know, do you now?" Was he able to feel her staring at him despite not being able to see her? How discomforting. 

"I didn't go inside the city boundaries, what in Algyron's name happened?" Did he manage to not notice how quiet the city was? 

"... Are you sure you want to know?" Anxiety shifted in her words. 

" _Yes!_ Why wouldn't I?!" This was getting ridiculous. Can't he just be told already? 

"Some druid knew where the Necronomicog was buried. Got people _killed_ and made them into _drink_." She didn't even try to cover the disgust in her voice.

A druid what? How was he supposed to process that? Maybe he had endangered... A lot of people with his plan but he knew- _thought_ \- he was going to be able to defeat it at the very least! This was just... Mass murder. And made into drink? That was _disgusting_. 

"You look like you're going to-"

"I- I'm _fine_. It's fine." He then realized how that sounded, "Not the murder thing that isn't... Oh by _Algyron_ is this being simply ignored?" 

"By who? There's no one there to do anything about it." It felt as though she wanted to say something else, but decided not to. 

"What about outside forces?! Those people are just... Dead now with the person getting away with it?!" 

"He was killed too, either way."

" _Yes but_ -!" He realized this was going nowhere, "I see." His voice became stone cold. That's how Orik and those others got the Necronomicog, wasn't it? He could imagine Orik's reaction to the druid's death well, "I... I definitely don't want to be near there, then. _Not at all_." 

"Look at you, still having the tiniest bit of common sense!" The Merchant spoke in a strange awkward mix of happy and stressed, as though she wanted to change the sudden very depressing mood. He didn't blame her. 

"Maybe too fast, merchant." 

"... My apologies." She sighed, then spoke once again, "You lived somewhere else before... This, right? Where was it?" 

"Uh-" No. That was complicated and also incredibly weird, but he should still say something, but his mind felt foggy and he couldn't come up with an answer and, "Somewhere." He wanted to punch himself. He wanted to punch himself _so_ _much_. 

The Merchant immediately burst out laughing as she failed to hold it in. 

"You're _serious?!_ " 

"Well-!"

"I expected you to say anything but that!" 

"I-!" 

"One moment we're talking about _mass murder_ , the next something like this happens. Oh how strange..." Her laughing became quieter and slowed down, "It's good to know some things haven't changed about you. It really is." 

That was the last thing he heard before he unexpectedly ended up passing out from exhaustion. 


	4. Outside

Gilgamech woke up to the fact he was, first of all, outside, and immediately panicked because he definitely did not remember getting out and he was absolutely not ready to fight. 

"Calm down! I just brought you outside! You fell asleep." The Merchant spoke as she tried to calm him down. 

"How did you- You- You're-" His words sputtered and broke as he tried to get himself composed. 

"I have my ways." She said simply. 

"Merchant. How did you _carry me out_." He knows for a fact he was essentially like a _tank_. Wearing his armor for the first time was an experience that was unforgettable just because of it. 

"Like I said, I have my ways." She shrugged. He didn't like that at all, but supposed he wouldn't get an answer any time soon. 

He decided to actually get a grip on wherever he was right now. Leaning against the wagon while sitting, so that was something. The sky was blue, the sun shining, but not too much to the point it was bothersome. The grass was green and definitely healthy, and there was a gentle breeze that he could barely feel. His furnace went cold as he realized just where exactly he was. 

"Where are we right now?" He asked in hopes he was wrong. 

"Near the Goosebucket area." His hopes were smashed with a hammer, "I thought it the best area since danger is pretty rare here." He decided to stand up, finding it somewhat easier than before and the grinding just a bit quieter. Leaning himself on the wagon with this time him standing instead of sitting, he looked down at her, since she was sitting down on a part of the wagon. He was pretty sure he didn't need to lean on things anymore when he stood, but he would rather be cautious right now. 

" _Great_." A part of him made sure to say that word with just the right amount of venom, "Why does your wagon just..." 

"Well you could've been outside if you so wanted. It would've taken longer though, you know." What did that even mean? 

"You told me to get inside." He got a shrug in response. He sighed in response to the shrug, "Your name is well earned." 

"Why thank you!" The Merchant exclaimed in a joking tone. Gilgamech didn't look amused. 

"I'm going to..." His sentence died as he pointed away from himself. 

"Try to not fall off the ledge." 

"Thanks." He walked over to somewhat close to the ledge with little problem, though he didn't get close enough that if he fell forward he would fall off. It felt weird to walk, but at least it wasn't like before he had been fixed. He wanted to see just where exactly he was, at the very least get a good grip on the area. That's what he would've done anyway, if he hadn't seen the _giant splayed out and taken apart Behemoth corpse surrounding a part of the area._

For a moment, he just was frozen there as the events of just a short time ago played through his head all at once at the same time in a single second. Then his body tensed up and he looked at the Merchant. Getting words out proved to be impossible. 

"What's... Why are you staring at me like that?" She sounded concerned and confused. After he couldn't seem to get himself to move, she sighed and got up and walked to where he was, only to casually say, "Oh. Yes, right. Don't worry it's very dead." 

" _Why is it splayed like that?_ " Of course it was dead, the world still existed! Something bigger must've done that to it, right? What had _happened?_ If there was something bigger, then they were in danger of something worse happening, weren't they? 

"Made into a golf course." The moment she finished speaking, Gilgamech was brought out of his shock and back into reality with the noise of what was best explained as sounding like a choked cough, a gag, and a wheeze come from him all at the same time as his body lurched forward. 

" _Excuse me?_ "

"I didn't know you could make that noise." 

" _Excuse. Me._ " 

"Right. Well it was killed-" He felt like she was rubbing that in his face, "and a fortress built over it again would be rather boring wouldn't it?" Why was she saying this so casually?! 

" _Who's idea..._ " His voice barely came out. 

"Orik's- don't move like that again it feels like you're about to." The Merchant quickly rushed out before he even could. 

"Orik?" 

"Yes." 

" _Orik_." He said again in a more matter of fact, grim tone this time. 

"Are you just going to be a broken record all day? Oh don't you give me that look." The look she was mentioning was a rather annoyed glare, "Yes, I can tell because the look you're giving me is something someone could feel miles away, so make sure to not point it at the village _you raided once before_ or some poor fellow will feel it instead."

He felt like something hit him in the head, "Wait a... How did we get here so quickly?" In his distraction, of well, everything, he hadn't bothered to ask how in Algyron's name he had gotten here so fast. The fortress was extremely far away, wasn't it? 

"You truly are distracted. You think you were out for just a day?" 

"I _wasn't?_ " 

"It's actually rather astounding. Good thing your body is essentially a furnace now. Makes it much easier to see when you're dead or not." He wasn't sure if she was joking or not, or if she was even telling the _truth_. 

" _Don't ask about that_." His tone was strict and he especially made sure of it. Lucky for him, she didn't say a word more of it. But her not saying anything just caused silence, because he wasn't exactly the best at conversation right now and was still incredibly overwhelmed. 

Looking out more at everything, he in a way came to terms with something. 

"I can get right to it yes? You're not used to this. I know it can be hard to adjust to something like this so fast." The Merchant was more than right. 

"I'm not used to it at all despite..." _Despite everything being done so fast_ , "One moment I'm leading some huge army the next I'm... The next I'm looking at a corpse of a thing I so desperately wished to kill-" He felt his hands making fists before he could stop them, "And I'm not the killer." That was jealousy, definitely. Gilgamech felt like the wind froze despite seeing everything else was still moving as though it was affected by wind. As though he had just confessed a crime and he was waiting for what the judge would declare. 

"It's impressive how you managed so much in just that many days. It's also terrifying and makes _anger rush through me_ that you decided to be so foolish, but that's in a new way also impressive too." She crossed her arms in a weirdly gentle manner. 

"It impresses me too." Is what he might have said had he not a single shred of pride or general common sense left. Instead, he said, "You didn't have to help me. And yet you made sure I didn't or that I didn't sit in isolation in that _grave_ long enough to consider ripping out the inner workings." As he said the last part, he tapped on his chest, "I should thank you for that, no?" 

"You keep making that fact a point so much that you might make me regret it. Or you'll make me regret it by doing something much worse, in which case I have full permission to let anger do whatever it wishes to do in that situation. You haven't thanked me just yet, that's a thank you that words can't help." 

"..."

"I didn't bring you here aimlessly. I brought you here because the only person who probably doesn't have to hold back causing a dent in your face lives in this area now. And that's because he more or less lacks that urge." He wasn't too sure about that. 

"And you've been holding back because...?"

"Because it'd be a shame to do it now."


	5. House

Getting there was a chore. The grinding noises were distracting, not to mention painful, and the way there was rather long. He felt lucky that Orik decided to not live directly in the town, and decided instead for somewhere farther away. The Merchant had stated it would be best they walk, as a giant wagon would bring attention. 

It was strange, really. Just a few days ago, he wanted that the most. And now he wanted to avoid it like the _plague_. 

All of this combined, it didn't help that the Merchant kept staring at him from time to time. He didn't even know why. That was, until he suddenly heard a cracking noise, felt pain strike through his left hand, and the Merchant had grabbed hold of it as fast as someone who had no sight could. 

"Oh my- I should've checked sooner." She turned his hand as he stared in silence. Words wouldn't come out, and he was pretty sure that would've been applicable even before the pain, "How strong is your grip? This doesn't usually happen..." 

_His grip?_

He turned to look at the hand being investigated, and realized what she meant. It wasn't that big of a wound compared to just awhile ago when he had been severely damaged, but it was the kind of wound that would cause people to be concerned. Specifically, he had apparently gripped his hand hard enough to cause his... _"Armor"_ to crack, and a small amount of oil was leaking out slowly. Nothing life threatening, but painful nonetheless. 

"You look surprised." She commented. 

"I didn't realize I was gripping my hand hard enough to cause this." He didn't like how his voice sounded at all. 

The Merchant released a slightly exaggerated sigh, "You didn't even... Gilgamech, you're stressed out of your mind are you not?" 

"Maybe so." He said, because saying "yes" felt like admitting defeat in a battle that never began, "No offense, I don't know if he hates me now."

"He doesn't." He wasn't sure if that was a worse answer or not. 

"You aren't him." He stated so that he had hoped that his so called "old friend" wasn't being so weird and concerning. 

"He's been worried about you." Oh that was even worse. He felt his hand clench again, only for the Merchant to force it back open, "You're not good at controlling stress are you." It was more a statement of fact than a question. 

It was even worse because usually he was. He was great at controlling it, he kept it hidden and then found his chance to let it out. It was a skill he had practiced for so long. Which is why it was distressing seeing himself _crash down_ like this and not even being able to _stop_ it. The last time he had been like this was before... _Several things_ happened, to say the least. He mentally shook his head to make sure he didn't think about that experience again. He was not exactly planning to have a breakdown in front of someone today, or for several days actually. And weeks. And years. 

"You expect me to be calm."

"I didn't expect you to cause a crack in your own hand because your grip was so tight." 

"Me neither." He noticed her wrapping something around his hand and quickly blocked it out of his mind. 

"You need to at least try not to destroy yourself before we can meet him." 

"I know." 

"You don't sound like it." There was a weird layer of something to her voice in that sentence. 

"Was that a _joke_?" He snapped. 

"Up to you." Oh Gods, she was smirking. 

The rest of the walk was quiet at least. Well, besides the grinding anyway. It was troubling how much it got in the way of his thoughts. 

"We're here." Soon enough pierced through the by then hard concentration on the noise of grinding. Of course, he shouldn't be focusing on it so much, but it was better than anything else he had to focus on.

The house they were now looking at was small. And quite literally besides that, there was nothing remarkable about it. That is except for the fact of who it belonged to. Gilgamech had known Orik to be the type to wander, to not exactly stay in one place. He also wasn't one to let age or anything else stop him from such a mission. Which made him try to pick through answers in his mind for exactly just why he would settle down. None of them seemed to apply. At the least, a house far away from town but not too far, and essentially nothing remarkable about it, had Orik written all over it. 

He noted he felt like a stone had been thrown inside his furnace. 

"Is he even home?"

"I don't know, really. Quite unpredictable, that one." He suddenly felt a nudging motion against him, "Well, are you going to knock or stand there all day?" He wasn't exactly sure. After what felt like an incredibly awkward staring contest, he even more awkwardly knocked on the door. 

There was silence, then the door opened, and Gilgamech felt like someone had just punched him in the face. Luckily, no one actually punched him in the face, but that somehow felt much worse. 

It was very much Orik, specifically his mask was still off, and he was being completely silent. His expression was full of shock, but not bad shock, but not happy shock either. The air around them suddenly felt thick and heavy as Gilgamech looked back. He had no idea how much time had passed when someone finally spoke. 

"You said to check on him but-" An extremely awkward pause,"Here he is. He's here now." Said the Merchant with a tone that he couldn't place. Gilgamech noticed the moment Orik moved his hand away from the handle of the door and formed a fist, only to press it to the bottom of his chin. How much time even passed? Seconds? _Minutes_? However long it was, it was feeling like forever instead. 

Finally, Orik spoke, "You should come in." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI SORRY IF THINGS SEEMS OFF QUEST DOESN'T SPECIFY SOME THINGS SO I HAVE TO MAKE IT UP I GUESS


	6. Talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HI THIS CHAPTER IS LIKE... RLLY TENSE AND MOSTLY ME OVERANALYIZING THE IMPLICATIONS OF QUEST. I promise next chapter will not be tense so dw

After the Merchant said that she would wait outside in order to give some kind of privacy, Gilgamech didn't remember how he got inside, how he got to the table, or how he even sat down in a chair. He didn't remember how he had ended up placing one hand on top of the other, or even how and why he had put his hands on the table in the first place. 

It felt too familiar, too familiar to the moment where he had heard the sickening cracks coming from inside his own body. From the moment he had been standing and summoning the Behemoth to the moment he was suddenly stuck on the ground in immense pain, with the only look on Orik's face not even being anger, fear, not even disappointment. 

The only emotion on his face had been _pity_. 

"You've been staring for quite awhile now." The present Orik's voice spoke up in a voice that was almost devoid yet full of emotion. 

"You're not wearing your mask." He said stupidly and proceeded to mentally slap himself. 

"I wasn't wearing it last time either." Orik's expression was harder to read than a million year dead language. In fact, everything about him was hard to read. Before, at least he could understand the shock on Orik's face. He could understand the movements Orik made. Here, it was all unreadable in the worst way imaginable. The way he had one arm on the table in a tense yet relaxed sense, or how for some reason he still held his other arm in a homemade sling instead of an actual sling, something that was less likely to accidentally unravel. The way he sat and the way he looked at Gilgamech. It was all unreadable in every sense of the word. It would probably be helpful if, like most steambots, he actually had pupils. 

"I thought it was temporary." They both knew what was being avoided. It was obvious to anyone with a thought process. 

"I had thought so too." Orik admitted with a tone in his voice that resembled nothing and everything. His arm that wasn't in a homemade sling reached up to his own face and tapped it mindlessly, "I realized soon enough I needed to make this permanent, and so I did. Not only for _my_ sake." 

He hated when he couldn't tell if Orik was looking away or directly at him. Everytime one or the other stopped talking, a heavy, thick weight of silence took it's place. 

"I see." Responded Gilgamech awkwardly. 

"Will you actually listen this time?" Finally asked Orik after a rather huge wave of silence. 

"Yes." He realized his voice choked on the word. It was obvious what Orik was referencing, to the day of him telling his plan. He hadn't listened last time, and now he was like... _This_. 

"I would like to ask something rather personal." 

"Go ahead." 

"What did you do to yourself?" 

"Explain." Why was he so vague sometimes? 

"Your armor. That is not a normal reaction, and I am sure you understand that." Orik pointed to Gilgamech's bright armor, and at that moment Gilgamech realized just exactly what he was talking about. 

"It was for efficiency." He answered simply. Orik's expression made sure it let him knew he wasn't happy with that answer, "With a body that has a larger furnace, efficiency in battle was raised. I could last much longer." Even when he didn't want to, he didn't say aloud. 

"You're making it run on _overtime_." For once, Orik could actually be read, and it was horror. 

"That is a more simple way of explaining." 

"Gilgamech... That's." He solidly paused his words, " _That's not okay_." 

"It is-" 

"It's not okay, not for _you_. You realize the consequences, yes?" 

"Yes. But I'm fine." It's not like he could simply reverse it anyway. 

"Considering everything, I don't believe it." Orik's tone changed suddenly to something unreadable once again, "I don't... _Why_?" 

"Why what?" 

"The last several days." He stated blankly. 

"Oh." His entire body tensed up, "That."

"I have reason to believe you never truly told me your reason." 

"It was to bring heroism-" 

" ** _No_**." Orik's tone managed to make him flinch, "I know that's not the whole reason. Something happened." 

"A necessary-" 

"Gilgamech. _Please_." 

"..." 

"I am not doing this again." 

"We were forgotten." 

".... We?" 

"We were forgotten." He repeated and as he gripped his hand into a fist, focused on the grinding, "We live and yet were thought to be dead." 

"That is true." At least he was being agreed with to some kind of extent. 

"We live and yet the memories of us are warped and changed for their amusement-" He could hear his voice losing it's stoic sense, "Changed for the sake of telling a story. And now, several are unthankful to us, several think us to be _dead_ , Orik." He noticed Orik's attention being caught at the sound of his name, "We are still _alive_! We still pump out steam into the _air_! And yet these people act as though the statues of me are simply graves of some kind! Talk of good wishes in the afterlife are heard while I'm still standing, while I'm still _here_! I'm talked about like I died long ago, like my body is somewhere deep underground rusting away! Not to mention the heroism that died along with my imaginary corpse people make up!" He didn't notice the increased steam he'd accidentally pumped out of his body until it fogged in front of his face. 

There was an even thicker blanket of silence that became a part of the room itself. It lasted for who knows how long, but he didn't even care. He just wanted Orik to say something, _anything_ , because the look he was receiving right now was so unreadable that he was sure he was about to be stabbed. 

After what felt like forever and a half had passed, Orik spoke, "So you decided to summon a monster in response." 

"It would show people I was alive, that you were alive. You were written out of history." 

"I know." 

"Aren't you bothered by that?" 

"No." Gilgamech's head shot up at that, an incredulous look smacked across his face. 

" _What_?" 

"I wasn't written entirely out of history. Even then, I wouldn't mind. I..." He paused, pushing up a mask that was no longer there, "I have never been a fan of large amounts of attention. It's preferred, in a way, that not everyone know what I have done except those who wish to dig deeply." 

Frankly, Gilgamech couldn't believe what he was hearing, "You think it's fine that people think you dead while you're still alive?!"

"I... I do not mind it." Hesitancy was clear in his voice. 

"Do you not realize how unhealthy that sounds." It wasn't even a question at this point. Orik was quiet once again. He wished everytime he had a conversation, this didn't keep happening, "Extremes needed to be taken."

"You have done more unhealthy things, Gilgamech." 

"Maybe so." He couldn't exactly... Deny it. No, not at all. 

"That includes the extreme you took." Orik tapped the table twice quickly, "Not only unhealthy for yourself, but unhealthy for everyone else around you. And I don't think you even realize it fully yet." 

"I do." 

"You _think_ you do."

"..." 

"I don't want it to be like this forever. I don't. I don't want you to be like this forever you've..." Orik sighed, "You changed. And I think it's been building up to it for several years now." 


	7. Clear Look

"Now that I get a more clear look of this... Uh..." Armilly paused, half for dramatic effect and half because she needed to find her words, "This place looks _wrecked_." 

"Considering the Behemoth let out that weird attack, I'm really not surprised..." Copernica said in response as she put a later of ice over another piece of wood. 

"Yeah but it's more obvious when you're up close, y'know?" Armilly tore off another piece of wood from the destroyed pile they had once been the official guild building. Frankly, all this wood was best used as firewood, now. It was all either cracked, weak, or just in pieces that could only hope to ever be put back together again, "What are you even doing to that wood?" 

"Did you not feel it through your armor?" Copernica asked, which resulted in Armilly looking blank faced, "I'll take that as a no. This stuff is hot. How it's hot still after days is a mystery, I can't even imagining making that happen with my alchemy. It'd have to be something strong... And the Behemoth was a god-made creation so I'm not far off." She let out a sigh, "Either way, putting ice on it will help." Armilly nodded her head in response. 

Then proceeded to tear off more wood from the pile, "Do you think I got a little stronger?" 

"To be fair, you were always pretty strong." The alchemist noted. Sure, the physical build for the most part didn't exactly reflect that... But she carried around a sword all the time and heavy armor. If she didn't get stronger, she would be confused. Armilly just shrugged, "Have you been feeling okay, by the way?" Copernica suddenly sounded worried. 

Armilly hesitated for just a moment too long, "I think so." Her voice suddenly was much quieter than usual, "But if I'm not, I will be soon enough, so don't worry." It took everything in her for Copernica to not seem too phased by her words. Only because then, she would be worried for her and not the person she should be worried about; _herself_. 

"Sorry about the sudden question." 

"It's fine, like I said, don't worry." A louder than usual crack, "Hey, look what I found!" Copernica's head perked up at the sudden laugh-like tone in her voice. Then realized as she half-ran over that Armilly was laughing. _Hard_.

"What's so-" Copernica almost made a choked sound as she began laughing too. It was the stupid chocolate fountain from before, shattered in pieces with hard, burned chocolate all over it. It looked absolutely and completely _pathetic_ , just like the guild who had created it. 

She never thought she would be here, taking apart a burnt down guild building and laughing so hard at something as simple as a broken chocolate fountain. Not to mention who she was laughing with, Armilly of all people was laughing at it. _Armilly_. Someone who had once almost worshipped the guild, who had tried all her life to get in only to be denied over and over and still continue on. And now here they were, laughing at just how pathetic the guild was. _Laughing together_. 

Despite the lingering pain from days past from the fight, despite how much was on their shoulders right now, since this whole mess started days ago, She felt truly and completely relaxed and happy for the first time in what felt like forever. This whole thing had lasted days, but that adventure felt almost like years. And now here they were, it felt... Unreal. But in the best way possible. And it probably helped that one of her best friends was there with her.

Her own laughter began to calm down, and she turned her head to look at Armilly. Seeing Armilly laugh was one of the things she had missed for awhile, even if it was in truth a short time. Reality simply didn't feel that short. And in a weird way, she was almost okay with that. _Almost_. 

"What do we even do with this thing?" Copernica asked, noting how her own voice still had a hint of laughter. 

"Throw it away, but I'm not sure where." If Copernica had laughter in her voice, Armilly had twice as much. 

Copernica bent downward to where Armilly was kneeled, and with a rather smug look and not a missing a beat, said, " _Gainz's door step_." Armilly burst out laughing.

"The twins are rubbing off on you!" The knight playfully pushed Copernica. 

"Maybe so!" 

"Oh no. I'm kind of considering it." She admitted.

"Happy I'm not the only one." Copernica took in just how free she felt in that moment.


	8. Orphanages and Caretakers

He had been worried. Actually, that was an understatement. He had been _terrified_. Bob was the definition of living scum, even in death, but he hoped even the definition of scum had some kind of _standards_. At least, enough to not murder children. He knew the menace hadn't gotten to everyone, but it was still of concern. An orphanage would be an easy target. 

Thankfully, Bob had apparently had the smallest amount of morals left, and hadn't decided to do such a thing. But when Galleo entered the building, it did leave him with a small amount of children who were all very confused on why the caretakers of the orphanage hadn't been seen in a few days (They also said he looked like a very nice frog, but that wasn't that important at the moment). Galleo hoped that maybe, the cowards had simply made a break for it or something. 

With anxiety burning in his furnace in place of coal, he had turned to Tarah and Thayne, "Keep watch while I go check, okay?" He had hoped his most comforting voice he could muster was actually comforting at all. 

"But what if..." Tarah had trailed off, her voice taking the same tone as the day she had admitted this was where she and her brother had grown. 

Galleo pointed to his own fist, "If anything happens, yell. I'll hear it," he remembered well those moments of pause, "I promise." The twins nodded in unision.

Searching around eventually lead him to a door with a sign on it that threatened punishment. He tore it down and ripped it apart, putting the scraps in one of his pouches to throw away later. Opening the door, he noticed how it was very much unlocked. Entering the room and looking at the other side of the door, was a very clear keyhole. Specifically, a _busted_ keyhole. Never a good sign. He decided it would be best to close the door, and so he did. Looking at the room, it didn't stand out. A desk, a window, a file cabinet, two chairs.

One chair was on it's side.

_Oh no._

The him from just a week or so ago would've bolted out of the room, and ignored all of this. Thing was, he was the him that was now (as confusing of a sentence as that was), and instead had made his way toward the chair. Then, he was behind the desk. And finally, was looking at oil. _Old_ oil. Oil that was like _solid paste and tar_. It wasn't much, but it seemed someone had, at some points, taken it into his own hands to get what he wanted. And had done it messily. 

Ok, now how did he tell a bunch of obviously young children that their caretakers were murdered. _Did he tell them at all_? Benji seemed to sense his anxiety, because he rubbed up against Galleo's face. That would've helped, usually, but he really, _really_ wasn't sure this could be helped with bird snuggles. 

He had gone back, took Tarah and Thayne outside, told them (and them only), and when he got blank stares and an unsure air about them, made sure to help. It was weird and strange, he didn't know what reaction to expect, but not this. But despite all this, what was happening was obvious.

They needed to find someone else to be a caretaker. Galleo couldn't live at the orphanage, and both Tarah and Thayne were simply children. The rest of his small social circle absolutely couldn't do it either. It was... A dilemma.

Luckily, life didn't have it out for him for once, and was able to find someone in an hour or so. Specifically, someone who wouldn't go and sell children to bandits or something. Someone who actually saw children and had some damn morals and cared about them. 

And then came having to give an explanation. Which he had no idea how to give. It was really a matter of what was the least traumatizing to tell a child. Telling the truth, as in murder, was really just going to make them feel unsafe. It wasn't like he could comfort them by going, _"Don't worry! Their murderer was killed by a demon tree!"_ He was trying to comfort children, not traumatize them.

Eventually it came to, well, something he remembered being told. He was still not sure if it was true or not. 

"They had to go somewhere?"

"Yeah." It felt really wrong lying to these kids, but he wasn't about to make them feel even more unsafe than they probably already felt. The new caretaker he had found had stood behind him, quiet, the entire time. They seemed to understand, and that worried him. Worried him that someone who grew up here understood so well. 

"When will they be back?" 

"Not for awhile, sorry. They won't be back for a long time, "He felt a familiar feeling and pushed it down, "But until then, me and them," Galleo pointed at the caretaker he had found, "Will take care of you. Them full time, and I'll be here part time. And I promise, we'll keep you as safe and well as we can." 

Later, he remembered shortly after that talk, the caretaker simply smiling and saying, "You did the best you could do. I'll do my best, too. I promise. Thank you." 

And just a day later, the difference was obvious. It was clear that the promise was absolutely being kept. The children already seemed happier, more carefree. It was a relief from the days past, from the chaos and fear taken from those days. 

It also probably helped that the children liked him. His social anxiety had tried to tell him that he wasn't going to be liked, that he was hated. But... No, they genuinely really liked him. It helped, even if being around that many people he had no connection to was anxiety-causing. At least, a connection that hasn't been made just yet. One he was determined to actually make. 

"Hey big guy!" Shouted Tarah's voice from somewhat far away. The child that was currently analyzing his rather big hand, wondering if he could have hands that big one day, turned his head toward the source of sound at the same time as Galleo and Benji did. 

Tarah and Thayne often went out, searching for supplies and the such. Slowly rebuilding the city, and fixing up the orphanage the best they could. Galleo often had to remind them that they definitely didn't need to steal anymore, handing them money to buy things like normal kids. They obviously weren't used to it, considering the times they came back with barely a dent made in the money, but plenty of supplies.

It was weird, he had never considered even the idea that he could take on the role of _father_ to anything that wasn't his small, gentle bird. Yet, here he was. He couldn't deny it at all, it was once again obvious what was happening here.

Both twins jogged up to him, supplies in hand, "We got you a drink, you look like you need it." Tarah half-insulted. She gave the drink to him, Galleo grabbing it with the hand that wasn't currently occupied by a child who had already gone back to doing whatever he wanted. There was hesiation, then he looked down into the drink before he even thought of consuming it. He wasn't going to repeat mistakes. 

Before he knew it, there was a gentle bright purple light over the drink. Looking up, the source was obvious. Thayne was doing his magic over the drink, making it act like a flashlight. The purple gently hit the liquid of the drink, but not enough to completely change it's color. Just enough to see that it wasn't the dark, sickly purple he still felt in the back of his throat sometimes. Thayne's expression showed nothing but complete _understanding_. 

"Thank you." 


End file.
